In a British news cell phone hacking sting operation evidence found on Shalea Plae, a French, Kuwait born free lance reporter has led to a complete upset of many scientific and religious thoughts through out the world.  Shalea Plae had hacked the I phone of Uticas Burning Stone, a descendent of Tecumseh (March 1768 – October 5, 1813)  a Native American leader of the Shawnee. It seems the Shawnee had an ancient detailed map of Ohio Valley plugged portals to hell and Uticas Burning Stone, charged with carrying this ancient knowledge, had downloaded the map with GPS locations to his I phone.  Shalea Plae had just accidentally uploaded the hacked information to an ex girlfriend  who then sent it on to wiki-leaks just moments before his arrest late new years eve.  Unpaid scientists, geologists and armchair O&G experts  the world over studying the wiki-leaks release soon concluded that the largest portal coordinates near Youngstown, OH had a waste injection well dead centered at the site.  It did not take long till expert after expert studying injection flow rates found a direct relationship to recent happenings of world peace.  As the flow rate increased more and more military troops left the middle east and entire nations achieved freedom almost exponentially.  The most telling proof was when Wen Wee Go of the Mayan Cultural think tank found extra years at the end of the Mayan calender that did not exist last week.  It seems the Youngstown well in addition to numerous other injection wells pumping more and more waste fluids from the recent increase of frack drilling in the region had pierced the ceiling of hell and has rained down on Satans parade.  As the fires of hell cool more and more examples of world peace appear, naysayers have constructive criticism and dead beat  know it all unemployed uncles have seemed to vanish from the Earth.  Satan could not be reached but a spokes person said Satan has given up on his goals of world domination and has purchased Momar Qaddafi’s old  estate in Elizabeth NJ where he will spend his eternity. 

Warning:  Nothing above is true and hopefully brings humor to a heated topic.  Pun intended